Thereafter I sat me against a tree.

I am in love with someone and his name is Robert.

I met him on Christmas morning my senior year of high school, but didn't feel like giving him a chance. He was old. I didn't understand him. I wasn't interested. He kind of bored me. It's not that I didn't appreciate him... I very much did. I just didn't feel like taking the time to get to know him. I had better things to do... or at least I thought they were "better things" back then. The idea of him sounded nice, but at the time he seemed like more work than anything else. So I let him go. I wasn't ready for him. I wasn't ready for what he had to say. I wouldn't have understood.

Years have passed since that Christmas day. Throughout those years I have endured things I never thought I could. I have learned the depths of my own heart in a way I never knew would be possible. Relationships have come and gone. Friendships have formed and some have passed. Loss has not yet taken its toll on me, but I have sensed its blackly, creeping ache crawl up into my chest from time to time. Yet I have also experienced the release of the lingering pain it creates by the mercy of God, so comforting and warm. Words and lyrics have changed my mind about the beauty and blister of life. I've begun to analyze things both big and small; both simple and convoluted. I've decided to stick to who I am. I've decided to change. I've decided and been indecisive.

I have not gotten anywhere.
I have come such a long way.

Then, in the midst of all of this, Robert entered my life again. But wait- he had been there the whole time. Literally, he was sitting right before me, sometimes even right beside me. But I didn't care to notice, even though it was me that put him there. His black and white didn't stand out, but the picture on his face did. It was a picture of a tree. I thought about what trees symbolize to me. I wondered if they meant the same thing to him. There was only one way to find out- I just needed to ask and hear what he had to say.

So I sat down with Robert late one night and he told me several stories. He gave me several rhymes. I considered his every word. I found much meaning in the things he said, while realizing not everyone could do do that. Not everyone could understand him like I do now. I became thankful that God put Robert in my life all those years ago, and even more thankful that He waited until now to show me who Robert truly is.

The Robert I'm speaking of is indeed real, and indeed a part of my life... just in a very indirect way: through his works.

You see... Robert is a poet, and a great one at that. In fact he's one of the best of all times. Robert Frost is a legend. He writes using metaphors about nature and connects it to the inter-workings of life. He talks about God and good and evil. He resonates with me in an amazing way. His words don't give me answers, but they give me hope and a sense of peace. They reaffirm the fact that I'm not alone in my joys and sorrows. They are a door to escape through; a wardrobe to my Narnia. The book of poems by Robert Frost which my mother gave me as a gift on Christmas is now a favorite among my tiny collection, and I believe it will remain that way. I enjoy my time with Robert. I wish he could know how much so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Demiurge's Laugh
By: Roert Frost

It was far in the sameness of the wood;
I was running with joy on the Demon's trail,
Though I knew what I hunted was no true god.
i was just as the light was beginning to fail
That I suddenly head--all I needed to hear:
It has lasted me many and many a year.

The sound was behind me instead of before,
A sleepy sound, but mocking half,
As one who utterly couldn't care.
The Demon arose from his wallow to laugh,
Brushing the dirt from his eye as he went;
And well I knew what the Demon meant.

I shall not forget how his laugh rang out.
I felt as a fool to have been so caught,
And checked my steps to make pretense
I was something among the leaves I sought
(Though doubtful whether he stayed to see).
Thereafter I sat me against a tree.