A Metaphor the Missed

There's something very comforting about you. It's not hard to pin-point because it's simply your entire being. I'm never worried when I'm around you. I never feel threatened, uneasy, or scared. When I see you, I'm relieved... carefree...

For years we've heard endearments like, "Your smile lights up the room." Yet I've never witnessed the illumination of an already lit room by a simple facial expression of happiness until you came along. Beaming rays of sun penetrate through my skin, sinking deep into my bones when your heart paints a genuine smile on your face. And it is your heart that paints that smile- your wonderful, wonderful heart.

I haven't the slightest clue what goes on in that mind of yours. You were never hard to read until I made you into a book of my own. You were a mystery and I turned you into a romance. You were a novel and I made you into a chapter. You were that book I couldn't put down and now cannot open back up.

It's sad when you're not allowed to read your favorite book.

There was something perfect about a hug from you. How no matter the blistering cold, you were always toasty warm. How you always held on so long... yet never long enough. How my head could rest perfectly on your chest... and my ear would easily hear that wonderful heart of yours beating so strong.

For years we've heard the lines and lyrics about beating hearts. But never had I heard a heart beat so loud... never had I felt such a powerful pulse.

Since you've been gone I've tried to find my way. And I've taken several roads, each one unique from the other. Some are rocky and lead to peace. Some are smooth and lead to destruction. Others are backed up with stop-and-go traffic and I wonder if I will ever make my way through. Some roads are lonely... for miles and miles I'll go with out passing by a single car, or having one pass by me. And I wonder... Will I ever find that comfort again?

I'm living my life in both chaos and tranquility. Shedding both vices and virtues. And in doing so, I am swayed by the idea of you and I. I am influenced by a heart that I once knew, and controlled by the one that keeps me alive.

I've made mistakes... done stupid things. But never was I told to be perfect. Not that I seek justification for follies, but I appreciate the sacrifice of unconditional love. Love is all I have and all I can give. Hate isn't a word in my vocabulary, and I pray it's never a component of my spirit. How could it be? It's just too harsh.

But some think love is too brash.

A mystery you were and a mystery you may remain. You are a chapter of my past, yet you are a co-author of my future.

You are a wonderful, wonderful heart.